One of the things that has been bringing joy to my life lately is providing safe spaces for people of color to connect, share their stories, and support each other. These spaces have been therapeutic for those who attended with tears flowing and connections made. People have shared experiences that they thought were unique to them only to find commonality and realize that they are not alone.
Many of us tend to isolate ourselves when we are having a hard time. We may pull away from friends and family during these times because we are usually the “strong one” the person who others turn to when they’re upset. We worry that if we shared our struggles the people that we love would be burdened. We tell ourselves that other people have their own stuff going on and don’t need to be stressed by what’s happening with us. Some of us isolate during times of trouble because we avoid being vulnerable. It feels scary to tell someone that we are having a hard time and need support. We worry that we might be judged or rejected if we open up. For some people, self-criticism keeps them from reaching out to others, they are so harsh on themselves that they can’t imagine receiving help from someone else. All of these ways of thinking keep us stuck, alone, in our pain. Believing that we don’t deserve, or shouldn’t seek support from loved ones keeps us from the very thing we need the most when we are going through a difficult time. Continue reading