For most of my life, I wasn’t a dreamer. I didn’t envision my future or have huge goals for my life. I didn’t allow myself to dream because I was too scared of the vulnerability of dreaming and hoping for something when I didn’t feel worthy of it. I was scared of envisioning a life that wasn’t certain to happen. Can you relate?
I fully acknowledge that I’ve had some big accomplishments in life, like getting a PhD, but in my family, these accomplishments felt expected rather than impressive. My parents’ prior accomplishments made me feel like I needed to follow in their footsteps in order to be successful. So, I did that. I’m not mad that I strived for success in academia, I’m actually very grateful and glad that I did… but I was still playing small.
I didn’t take time to reflect and craft a vision for my life beyond the confines of the conventional. When my focus was on proving that I was worthy and filling the internal void I felt, I didn’t have the energy to consider what I really wanted for my life. I couldn’t tap into the courage that was necessary to take the leaps toward a more fulfilling life.
Low self-worth keeps us from dreaming…
Trying to prove our self-worth takes up a lot of much mental and emotional energy and keeps us stuck in a place where we’re living for the approval of others. This makes it difficult to have the space and energy for dreaming and imagining what might be possible for us. Following society’s scripts or other people’s dreams for our lives is extremely limiting and even if we know that doesn’t work for us, we may not have the courage to expand beyond those limits.
Low self-worth also fosters harsh self-criticism. Even when we do consider what we want in life, we often shut those thoughts down with judgement and statements that we’d never accomplish what we hope for.
If you’re feeling stuck in life and you’re not sure how to break free, consider whether low self-worth, trying to prove your worth, or any of the reasons I just talked about is what’s contributing to your feeling stuck.
Unconditional self-worth supports us in envisioning a life for ourselves that’s beyond our wildest dreams!
Unconditional self-worth is the sense that you deserve to be alive, to be loved and cared for, and to take up space just because you’re human. When we connect to this, we can shift our focus from proving that we are worthy to focusing on envisioning and pursuing the life we most desire. At the core, it’s about our relationship with our Self.
When we know we are worthy unconditionally, we are kind, compassionate, trusting, and forgiving with ourselves. It’s in THIS environment that dreams are able to grow and flourish and that we are able to tap into the courage to dream. We then have a safe and healthy relationship with ourselves that makes it safe to be vulnerable with ourselves and to envision the life we most desire.
Once I began to connect with my unconditional self-worth, something began to shift within me. I began envisioning small things and seeing them show up in my life. Then, I let myself dream bigger and bigger, tapping into bold and wild dreams! I suddenly realized that one of my dreams was to be an entrepreneur… and here I am, officially working for myself, full-time!
Own your wants and desires. It may feel risky, but that’s where the power lies. Tap into your unconditional self-worth and own this powerful shift!
To start tapping into what you truly desire in life, reflect on these questions:
What would you dare to dream if you knew you were unconditionally worthy?
What would you stop doing if you already knew you were worthy?
What would you find the courage to do if you knew you were worthy unconditionally?
These are powerful questions that I want you to sit with and wrestle with. If you journal, write about the thoughts that come up for you without judging or analyzing them. If you meditate, give yourself space to meditate on these questions.
Live these questions. You don’t need to have the answers immediately. Take your time and allow your internal wisdom to guide you to them as you go throughout your days. Be patient with yourself in this process because it’s truly an adjustment and a shift that you’re going through.
The world will be a better place when we can all show up fully. Knowing that we are worthy and knowing what we dream for ourselves helps us to do that.
Want to learn more practices to help you connect with your unconditional self-worth? Sign up for my free e-book on the topic: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/5f0480e1ba80b7002606b16b
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